Module:

Unresolved Grief

This month is about grief. The term “grief” often resonates with survivors of narcissistic abuse – it’s the loss of opportunities, hopes, aspirations, narratives, instincts, and sense of self. For survivors of narcissistic abuse in intimate/committed relationships – it’s about grieving not being cherished in a close relationship, intimacy, companionship, the hope of having two parents raising children together, the idea of growing old with someone, caring for someone and having them care for you. For survivors of narcissistic parents, it can be the grief of childhood, of not feeling safe, or enough, or seen, heard, or valued.  If the narcissistic relationship ended, there may be a sense of relief, but it is far more complex than that. Ideologically people grieve a loss of innocence and hope, and the cycle of grief can leave a person overwhelmed, anxious, helpless, hopeless and confused. Ultimately, not running away from the grief, but making the brave journey through it, is essential to the healing process. There is a real risk in denying the process of grief, ignoring it or minimizing it. To do this, means in some ways to block the healing process.