How do you view the world? September is “schema” month
Healing from Narcissistic Relationships
September 2025
Month Overview:
What is a schema? It’s a fancy way of saying “mental map,” mental shortcut, or way of seeing the world, the people in the world, yourself, and your beliefs. It’s the way we organize the world and the information we get from the world.
Why does this matter to your healing? Well, we all have them – otherwise we would be pretty inefficient. But as you can imagine - if these maps aren’t healthy, it can take a toll on us (and narcissistic relationships always mess with our schemas and make them less healthy).
And why does this matter for survivors of narcissistic relationships? For lots of reasons -these relationships shape our schemas, and often in bad ways. If a narcissistic relationship comes into our lives in adulthood, existing schemas can get blown up – there is a sort of a schema before and a schema after.
But the good news is that these schemas are not permanent – they are amenable to change, and changing our schema is part of healing. So, this month – let’s take on our world views and how our own data processors for the world work and find out how your schemas can be helping and hindering your healing.
Module Overview
- Journal Prompt: For this first prompt, think of schemas as your worldviews or beliefs. Write down whatever comes to mind. (09/01/25) (2:58)
- Journal Prompt: Building on the first prompt, look back at the worldviews or beliefs you wrote down and note where you think each one came from. (09/03/25) (2:10)
- Journal Prompt: Schemas are ways we try to adapt to our circumstances. Reflect on how the beliefs you listed help you function, adapt, or protect yourself. (09/05/25) (3:53)
- Journal Prompt: Reflect on how the beliefs you listed (which may be schemas) affect how you feel, behave, react, and cope. (09/08/25) (3:49)
- Journal Prompt: Reflect on how these beliefs or schemas were shaped by narcissistic relationships, trauma, or betrayal. (09/10/25) (3:13)
- Journal Prompt: This prompt looks at before and after in adult narcissistic relationships. Did your schemas shift as a result, and if so, how and why? (09/12/25) (2:37)
- Journal Prompt: Do you have schemas you consider healthy? If so, what are they, where do they come from, and how do you maintain them? (09/15/25) (2:17)
- Journal Prompt: Schemas are shaped by childhood, adult relationships, and life experiences. What has most influenced your schemas, and why? (09/17/25) (3:45)
- Journal Prompt: How has the wider world—culture, social media, society—shaped your schemas? Are these influences stronger, weaker, or do they intensify schemas from close relationships? (09/19/25) (4:06)
- Journal Prompt: Which of your schemas or beliefs are hardest to let go of, and why? (09/22/25) (3:21)
- Journal Prompt: What fears come up when you think about changing your schemas? (09/24/25) (2:42)
- Journal Prompt: Do you notice strong reactions you later regret? Can you link them to your schemas or triggers? (09/26/25) (3:21)
- Journal Prompt: Pick your most concrete schema from prompts 1–3. Note its origin and function, then list: alternative beliefs, responses, self-compassion, and evidence to counter it (09/29/25) (3:17)